The bus itself was a luxurious two level coach and as there was plenty of empty seats everyong did their best to grab double seats that gave them a good view of the televisions screens for when the movies came on.
Thankfully they didn't go round with the video camera, like the did from Cusco to Lima, but they were still pretty thorough and made us give big blue fingerprints on a chart of where our seat allocation was meant to be, and just like on an airport they had a ready supply of entrance and exit visa documents for us to complete in advance to help speed us through customs.
However, considering that it was dark outside, the only gave us about thirty second to complete them before they turned off all the lights and started the dvd playing, which was a homemade triple bill of action movies featuring Jason Stratham, which was pretty cool except it was all in Spanish with no subtitles at all.
Around 11.30pm we reached the checkpoint and we all had to get out, fill along a queue and get our passports stamped, which went very quickly fast and I was kind of curious why some of the people on the bus remained fast asleep and had not budged. Thanfully the customs woman that I got was more interested in watching their version of come dancing than on inspecting my passport or asking any awkward questions ( which for me would have been anything harder than "What is your name" ) and quickly I was back on the bus and away again.
I thought that it had all gone very smoothly, too smothly in fact, and I was just wondering how they could leave anyone on the bus when after about half an hour we reached checkpoint 1.2 and we all had to file out and visit the police desk stationed there, and while we were doing this they took a dog through the bus.
Another half an hour later and we reached a military checkpoint and the made us all get out, go through a bodysearch ( thankfully clothed and not a full cavity version ) and then made the bus driver pull away and over a weird set of huge gaps in the ground, before it reached the other side and we were all allowed to get back on it and drive away.
With all getting on and getting off I really didnt get any sleep and so when the bus arrived early, according to my understanding, in Guayaquil at just after 4am I was at a loss as to where to go as I very much doubted that my hostel reception would be open at that early.
So I milled about for a bit, got some lcoal currency and made the mistake of putting a US $20 bill into a maching that gives change and must have looked like a fruit machine jackpot winner and it chucked out 80 x 25 cents coins, then grabbed a local burger ( McDonalds wasn't open yet ) and failed to get an advanced ticket to Manta despite finding my way to the a desk that said Manta on it!
The terminal was pretty large, spanning over three levels and it must have had about a hundred departure points, yet the locals have not yet quite grasped how to use elevators. There was a full elevator full of people, including me, and yet as soon as the door opened on the ground floor and we all tried to get out all three of the people that had been waiting to enter the lift all forefully barged their way through us to get to the back of the elevator instead of calmly stepping aside and letting us through.
This rudeness I could not forgive, especially as in the lift was a handicapped person and also large trolley, so by being so forceful they upset and delayed eveyrone, including themselves.
For US $4 I managed to get a taxi the fifteen minutes from the bus termainal to my hostel at about 5.30 in the morning, however I then had my very own Monty Python moment.
Imagine if you will, a dark and slighly foggy scene, a high gated rampart blocking your way to the holy grail, high unscalable walls preventing you from climbing over and so you are forced to knock and hope.
I knocked and a few minutes later a head popped over the top of the ballastraid and shouted down something at me in a thick and muffled accent before dissappearing.
Slightly bemused I waited for about 5 minutes for the bodyless bobbing head to come down the long flight of staits and let me in, but to no avail.
So I knocked again, slightly louder and the head popped back again, and although I was cold, hungry, tired and in desperate need of both the toilet and a change of clothes I kept my cool and asked in my best Spanish at what time did the doors open, only for him to mumble back something and then yet again dissappear., and all the while at the back of my mind I could clearly hear John Cleese saying "Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time"!
So much so, in fact, that despite being neglected I could not surpress a big grin and I began to recite line after line til I had exhausted my memory and then sat down to wait for the inevitable opening of the gate, or for someone to bring me a trojan rabbit, whichever would occur first.
As it turned out it was only 6.30 when they let me in, gave me breakfast and showed me to my dorm of 8 beds, all of which were empty and as I was told a bit later on, they would all remain empty for my entire stay as they did not have any dorm booking until the middle of the week.
The wait was worth it though, and for only US $12 I got a room to myself, the place looked fantastic, has a pool, a garden to lounge in, desk chairs, free wifi, a large collection of movies to watch in the TV room and enough leaftlets of places to do and places to stay to build a paper mache trojan badger, once the rabbit had been catapulted away.
I shared my breakfast with a delightful American woman, who took pleasure in telling me all about her dislike for Bush, which I whole heartedly agreed with, and then went on to tell me about a little bit about her background and then the story of how her innocent and naive scientist brother was false accused and set up by the goverment in order to prevent another scandal just after the anthrax debarcle. It was almost a shame when at 8am my friend arrived and I had to leave her, but I am sure she will have a great time in her school studying Spanish.
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